Southern Romance Novels by Loraine Despres

Southern Belle's Rule!

THE SOUTHERN BELLE’S HANDBOOK, Sissy LeBlanc’s Rules to Live By is a girl’s survival guide for life. It’s inspired by generations of Southern wisdom and is dedicated to all those beautiful Yankees and their modern Southern sisters who are intelligent, well-educated, worked out... and miserable.

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Some of the tips you’ll find in it:

ATTRACTING MEN IS EASY

How to Make Conversation:

Men always find themselves the most fascinating subject of any conversation. When in doubt, let him talk about himself. He’ll think you’re a brilliant conversationalist. Rule Number 11

Laugh at his wit, and he’ll admire your sense of humor. Rule Number 13

Let him know you think he’s intelligent and he’ll be awed by your perspicacity, even if he can’t pronounce the word. Rule Number 15

How to Get His Attention at a Party:

Look at him over your shoulder or up at him through your eyelashes, and he’ll salivate like a Pavlovian dog. Pat the seat next to you and he’ll come bounding across the room. It’s usually ok, to let him sit on the furniture. Rule Number 5

HOW TO KEEP HIM HAPPY

Forget his stomach. The surest way to keep a man happy is to become his cheerleader. Rule Number 33

HOW TO HANDLE HIM, BECAUSE EVEN THE BEST MEN NEED SOME HANDLING

Men fantasize about being a knight and rescuing a maiden in distress. Encourage this. It’s a good thing. There’s no reason for you ever to struggle pushing a heavy bag into an overhead compartment. Ask him do something easy for you and thank him sweetly. He’ll feel great about himself– and you. Rule Number 48

A smart girl lets a man take full credit for doing exactly what she wants him to do. Rule Number 92

A Southern Belle picks her fights. There are so many other ways to get what you want. Rule Number 26

HOW TO TELL IF HE’S GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU

There are two kinds of men. The ones who are interested in you and the rest. The second kind are so misguided, they’re not worth your time. Because if a man doesn’t have the sense to appreciate you, he obviously doesn’t have any sense at all. Rule Number 71

Never settle for a man too stupid for you. He’ll spend the rest of your life getting even. Rule Number 43

Never marry a man who makes your skin crawl. Rule Number 103

WHAT TO DO ABOUT TEMPTATION

A Southern Belle doesn’t have to give into temptation, but she might not get another chance. Rule Number 39

SEX AND THE SOUTHERN BELLE

When deciding whether or not to have sex, a Southern Belle does exactly what she wants, while perpetuating the illusion that, although this might not be her first time, it’s certainly the first time that ever mattered.

HOW TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

It’s OK for a woman to know her place. She just shouldn’t stay there. Rule Number 48

Don’t jump off the roof, if you don’t expect to hit the ground. This bit of wisdom comes from Sissy’s Suffragist grandmother, Belle Cantrell. Rule Number 62

You have to take your life into your own hands otherwise you can be damned sure, someone else will take it in theirs. Rule Number 32

HOW TO AGE LIKE A GRACEFUL SOUTHERN BELLE

When you get to be a certain age, you realize that the only thing you have time for is doing exactly what you want . Rule Number 56

For more rules and taunt tips order THE SOUTHERN BELLE’S HANDBOOK, Sissy LeBlanc’s Rules to Live By. Click Here to Order


Reader Becki Pugh submitted the following rule:

A smart girl knows that any man will grab your ass, but a woman will help save it.


Reader Patti Thompson contributed the following rule for The Southern Belle's Handbook:

"Ask his opinion about anything and everything, then quote him when you can be sure it will get back to him. He will think you are brilliant and fascinating."


Reader Mary Addamus contributed the following rule for The Southern Belle's Handbook:

"A Southern Belle knows spending time fulfilling her own needs makes her a better partner and lover."


Reader Nicolette McClure contributed the following rule for The Southern Belle's Handbook:

A smart girl knows that whatever she does today affects tomorrow, so she likes to get a jump start on it.


Reader Matt Smith contributed the following rule for The Southern Belle's Handbook:

A smart girl knows that a man's fear of commitment is his way of saying he's figured you out. Keep him just a little off guard and he'll come back for more.



For more rules and taunt tips from the Southern Belle’s Handbook read The Scandalous Summer of Sissy LeBlanc, by Loraine Despres, William Morrow/HarperCollins, published November 1, 2001.


Submit your own rules, and see if they get posted.

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Copyright Loraine Despres 2001-2006

Southern Literature by Loraine Despres